Saturday, December 5, 2009
Why Can't We Be Friends?
I'm starting to think I'm a bad friend. I had 6 bridesmaids, 4 of whom were friends (the other 2 were SIL and my cousin). I have drifted from all of them and I've only been married 5 years (which feels like 5 seconds or 100 years, depending on the day). The one thing all 4 have in common is me, so does this mean I'm the problem? My maid of honor and I have been friends since we were in nursery school. I'd say we spent a good 75% of our time together in our early 20's. She practically lived at our condo. Now, we barely speak. I can't tell you what happened, because I don't know. There was no falling out and we do get together it's a fabulous time, but these times are few and far between. I suppose life got in the way. I only keep up with my college friends, K and S, through Facebook. S just another kid a couple months ago and I didn't even know she was pregnant. I love(d) these woman, why do I never speak to them anymore? Is this going to happen with my current close friends? I don't know how it happened before, what can I do to prevent it from happening now? As much as I enjoy being Kyle's wife and Logan's mom I need my girlfriends.
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FWIW, I think you're a great friend! Sometimes life just gets in the way and people end up on opposite trajectories. It's sad, but it happens. And who knows, your paths might very well converge again sometime down the road! My BFF from high school and I completely lost touch after our first year at different colleges. We finally reconnected in 2006, after not speaking at all for a good 6 years, and picked up right where we left off.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand exactly what you are saying. I still talk to two of my bridesmaids...my sister and Matt's sister! Ha! Other than that, I don't talk to the other two girls. Like you, there wasn't a falling out. My life went in a different direction, as did theirs. With my one friend, she doesn't have kids, doesn't understand the time commitment, doesn't understand that I can't drop everything for drinks, etc. The second friend, I really don't know what happened and I really miss her!
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